THE STORIES of BREAST CANCER
August 2009

IN THIS ISSUE

Message from the Executive Director
The Emotional Side of Hair Loss
EVENTS * EVENTS * EVENTS!
Healing Words Online Workshops: Leah Carey
Helpful Programs, Products, Videos & Books

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MESSAGE from the EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR

Do you see that photo at the top of this email?  That's me five years ago at my in-laws during Easter.  To help prepare my nieces and nephew for my impending baldness, I told them they could paint my head once my hair fell out.  Every time I saw them prior to they would pull off my cap and be outraged - how DARE I not be bald yet! "Can we at least paint your forehead Aunty Wendy"

Ah, kids ... so innocent and impatient!

Once Easter arrived it was finally time for them to get artistic.  I went out and bought all kinds of paints and brushes and sat cross legged on the floor while they went to town on my head.  Then they made me wash it off so they could do it all over again.

The next article talks about the emotional side of hair loss.  Although it was emotional for me, I tried very hard to find the humor in it ... it really helped me to get through what could have been a devastating emotional time.  Sometimes we just need to laugh at ourselves because it WILL get better!

We hope you like the new format of our newsletter and please visit the stories on our website - they are poignant, humorous and touching.

All My Best

Wendy McCoole
Executive Director, Founder & Survivor
MY STORY: www.breastcancerstories.org/profile/wmccoole

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THE EMOTIONAL SIDE of HAIR LOSS

Susan Beausang, a breast cancer survivor and maker of BeauBeau head scarves, recently asked a number of people what it was like to lose their hair.  With permission, here are some of the responses she received.

The Hardest Part of Losing Hair:

"Feeling less than whole - like I had lost part of me"

"Hair loss branded me as a cancer patient and 'different' when I desperately wanted to hold on to the normal parts of my life."

"It was a constant visual reminder that I was sick. My head was cold. The kids looked at me funny and had such a hard time trying to understand what was happening. It was hard to be anonymous in public. I looked like a different person in the mirror...it shocked me continually."

"It drew attention to me (to be bald and have no eyelashes or brows) and said out loud 'I HAVE CANCER - PITY ME!!!' I hated it."

"Family and friends didn't look at me like I was sick until I lost my hair. Now I feel like I have cancer. The idea that I could die is real."

Most Helpful Responses from Friends/Loved Ones:

"The best thing was my family and friend's honest reactions that 'different' didn't mean 'bad' and me bald was just that - 'different'.

"My husband rubbed/lightly scratched/massaged my head almost every day. And he would kiss the bald head. That made me feel like he didn't mind and still loved me."

"The best responses I got were from survivors who came up to me and said, not it will grow back, but 'I'm X years out, and you'll get through this'."

"When my 11-year-old daughter came up to me when I was crying and said 'You are still beautiful mom'!"

"It's not your hair we like, it is you."

Bothersome Responses:

"Some people would say, it's just hair. At least you are alive. I knew I was alive, it's just hard for them to understand."

"It seemed to invite people (strangers) to ask questions that I didn't always want to answer i.e. type of cancer (diagnosis), prognosis, etc."

"When people wanted to know why I didn't want to wear a wig (uncomfortable!) - like I needed to hide my baldness to make them more comfortable."

"Don't worry it will grow back. It's like, Duh! yes, I know that, but it will take 3 or 4 YEARS to get back to where I started.

Something that has made a significant difference in coping with hair loss:

"I took up running and playing tennis, both of which made me feel healthy and strong again, and challenged people's perceptions of me as a cancer patient."

"As it started returning, we have been taking a weekly picture. I can't really see the progress on me, but when I look at those pictures, it's amazing!"

"I surrounded myself with a variety of head wear options, whether it be a beaubeau or hat, etc. It makes you feel more in control. Also, I got a trendy short haircut before chemo and shaved my head two weeks in. It's easier when you feel like you are driving the process."

"I attend meetings at cancer support groups as often as I can. It is a place where everyone knows and feels what I'm talking about. I can let my guard down."

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EVENTS * EVENTS * EVENTS!

BreastCancerStories.org has some fantastic events planned for 2009/2010!  Visit our EVENTS page for more information on any of the following or to register online!

CELEBRATEPINK Rockin' Bowl-a-thon
August 29, 2009
A team-based bowl-a-thon at the Bowl-O-Rama in Portsmouth, NH with plenty of fun and prizes!  REGISTRATION AVAILABLE NOW! (it's not too late to sign up)

CELEBRATEPINK 5K Road Race & Walk
September 19, 2009
Beginning in downtown Portsmouth, NH, going over the Memorial Bridge
into Kittery, ME and returning.  Runners and walkers of all levels are welcome to participate.  REGISTRATION AVAILABLE NOW!

"I Survived Breast Cancer and All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt!"
May 15, 2010 at The Music Hall - Portsmouth, NH
LEARN MORE

VOLUNTEERS NEEDED!
We need your help to make our events successful!
Please EMAIL US for more information.

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HEALING WORDS ONLINE WORKSHOPS: Leah Carey

Join facilitator Leah Carey for a written exploration of your breast cancer experience – from diagnosis, through treatment, and into recovery. Leah will lead you through the process of writing about your experiences and sharing them with a small group of survivors. During the six weeks, you will have the opportunity to express your unique experience as she explores many aspects of breast cancer – from the fear of diagnosis to the joys of survival – in a warm, supportive, and non-judgmental online group process.

Over the last five years, Leah has presented this well-received workshop to a wide variety of groups in person. This will be its maiden voyage on the internet using video conferencing. Be a part of the first group to experience this powerful workshop in an exciting new medium!

WHEN: Tuesdays at 7PM EST Aug 25 - Sept 29

CLICK HERE for more information and to sign up*
* There is a $125 for this 6-week session - that's a 50% savings off the regular session price.

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HELPFUL LINKS, PROGRAMS & PRODUCTS

Breast Cancer Websites
Breast Cancer Programs
Breast Cancer-Related Products
Breast Cancer Events

* BreastCancerStories.org does not directly endorse any of the products or services outlined within these directories.

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